The other day, I was chatting with a friend at a sandwich shop. She started to complain about her weight and how badly she wanted to wear a bikini for summer. As a woman who has always carried an extra 20+ pounds despite my best efforts to diet and exercise it away, I looked at my thin blond friend, smiled sympathetically, and fantasized about punching her in the throat.
Few things are more irritating to me than when a slim person bemoans being fat. And where the hell did she get the idea she was fat anyway? Though fit and very attractive, she’d convinced herself she was overweight; therefore, unacceptable and unworthy of wearing the gold standard for physical perfection, i.e. a bikini.
As I continued listening, I realized her feelings went much deeper than aspiring to acquire the coveted “bikini body.” Historically, society has always judged women on appearance, oftentimes with women themselves being their own harshest critics.
In the age of political correctness, neo-feminism, and the body-positivity movement why now, more than ever are we obsessed with physical perfection?
According to the American Society of Plastic Surgeons, there were approximately 17.5 million cosmetic procedures done in 2017, with breast augmentation, liposuction, and nose reshaping being the top three procedures performed. (www.plasticsurgery.org)
We are inundated with weight loss programs, fitness gurus, movie and T.V. shows, magazines, social media, cosmetic manufacturers, fashion designers, and even the medical industry selling their idea of physical perfection. Many of us watch, listen, and internalize these arbitrary concepts of beauty, believing perfection equals happiness. Then it hit me. Who said we had to be perfect in the first place?
In nature, nothing is perfect. Look at any tree, animal, landscape or sunset. Their beauty comes from variances in design, color, texture, and form. It’s these imperfections which makes each, beautiful and unique.
My friend didn’t understand her beauty was intrinsic and not dependent on achieving the “perfect” weight or fitting into a bikini. I couldn’t convince her otherwise, and I thought of how many of us fall down the same rabbit hole in pursuit of physical perfection, never realizing beauty is in the flaws.
Toni O.